I’ve been following a lot of the conversations in various circles about creeps, both online and in various communities I move through, and I’m really glad that this topic is getting more traction. I know that it’s a tough thing to bring up, for a variety of reasons, but until something gets brought into the […]

One of the common concerns that men have when it comes to receiving prostate play or anal penetration is the fear that it implies anything about their masculinity. There are a lot of assumptions about being penetrated. It’s seen as “the woman’s role” or something that gay men do, so straight men are often hesitant […]

There are lots of things we can do to make the world a better place. We can reduce our consumption of irreplaceable resources, we can develop our capacity to bring compassion to our relationships, we can support people in crisis or need- there’s plenty to be done. And there’s one thing that I think has […]

Jaclyn Friedman, the author of What You Really, Really Want (an amazing book that I think everyone should read), has a guest post over at feministe.us about the ways that women attack and shame other women around sexual assault. It’s a great read, but then, pretty much everything she writes is. One of the things that […]

CNN.com has a report today about Kirk Andrew Murphy, a man who committed suicide in 2003. His story is especially poignant because he was subjected to treatment when he was younger that was intended to force him into gender conformity. As part of it, he was given blue poker chips for rewarding masculine behavior and […]

One of the difficulties that those of us who are looking to challenge the Act Like a Man Box (see my post The Performance of Masculinity for an explanation of that, if you aren’t familiar with it) is that the Box itself gets in the way. My observation is that’s because “believes in the Box” […]

I’ve been teaching workshops on male gender socialization for about 15 years or so. The foundation of my presentation is the Act Like a Man Box, which I learned about from Paul Kivel’s book, Men’s Work: How to Stop the Violence That Tears Our Lives Apart. I like calling it the “Act Like a Man […]